During the short mission trip, a group of eleven of us, consisting of seven Korean and four Singaporean students, had the opportunity to visit and stay in a small church in Busan. We were introduced to the Korean culture as we interacted with the pastor and his wife and the congregation there. The pastor and his wife were extremely hospitable and had no qualms about allowing us to stay in their church for the night. They even provided us with food and treated us to ice-cream and Chinese cuisine at a nearby restaurant before we left.
Manner of greeting
In Korea, when you meet an elderly or someone first, it is good manners to greet first by stooping at a 30 degree angle and maintaining that posture for two to three seconds, while holding up your head. As for men, keep your arms and hands tight to your body and as for women, keep your hands together in front and stoop. It should be done in front about 2 to 5 meters away. The upper body stooped in greeting should be held up slowly after the interval of one breath of receiving the other’s return courtesy. Also, stooping slightly is just enough as the manner but nodding is considered to be bad manners. It is good manners to keep eye contact while stooping and to maintain that posture for a second. It is also good to say Annyeonghasipnigga (Hello) while stooping.
Source: Seoul, Jang-gu Culture and Tourism, http://tour.junggu.seoul.kr/english/zoom/zoom03.php
Upon reaching the church, we were greeted first by the pastor’s wife, who was standing a considerable distance away from us. Her manner of greeting was the typical 30 degree angle stoop, with her hands together in front of her. Along with the stoop came the verbal greeting “Annyonghaseyo”. I wasn’t too sure how to respond to the greeting and was feeling a little nervy for fear that I would appear to be rude. Thankfully, the Koreans in my team immediately reciprocated the greeting in a similar manner. The four Singaporeans mimicked what they did.
In Singapore, we would normally go up to the person and give a handshake to someone whom we were meeting for the first time, but it wasn’t in their culture to do so. At that point, I actually felt like I hadn’t greeted the host properly and had the urge to go up to her and reach out my hand to offer a handshake, but I eventually refrained from doing so. I wasn’t sure how they would react to a handshake and thought I’d just play safe by following what the Koreans did.
On the last day, the pastor sent us off to the bus stop and, to our surprise, gave each of us a handshake before he left. Even then, his other arm and hand were kept tight to his body and his back was slightly arched, which were characteristics of the Korean manner of greeting. I wasn’t sure if it was the influence of western culture in their lifestyle too or it was out of courtesy for our culture that he offered the handshake, but I was really grateful for that handshake. It allowed me to sincerely thank him for his love and hospitality towards us throughout our short stay there, in a manner that I was familiar and comfortable with. 
This is a very detailed reflection on one aspect of your Korean cultural experience. I like the way you put the discussion in a clear context and how you honestly assess your own level of comfort with the norm for greeting that you were encountering.
ReplyDeleteI was wondering though about the info in italics. Is that from a guidebook or something?
Thanks, Grace!
Hi Mr Blackstone,
ReplyDeleteThe information is from a website on the tourism and culture in Korea. Sorry I forgot to mention it in my post. Thanks!
Hey Grace,
ReplyDeleteInteresting post... And I must agree with Brad in that it is very detailed. Furthermore, I must admit that I have been enlightened by this account about this aspect of Korean culture.
However, I do have an important question. Don't these people ever get back-aches? Stooping at a 30 degree angle whenever you meet an elderly person or someone for the first time must be quite a feat! I am sure the Koreans must be pretty flexible people. Somehow, I 've got new-found respect for them.
Hi Grace,
ReplyDeleteI thought that the pastor and his wife were wonderful hosts. I recalled the other time when I went to Thailand for a holiday and we were always greeted with their way of greeting. I actually felt very welcomed as their way of greeting made us felt like one of them. After a while, we got used to their style of greeting and reciprocated in their style and they seemed very happy. When you stated that you felt bad when you did not greet your hosts like the way you always do, maybe you can look at it from this point that when a similar style is adopted, it constructs an affinity between the two parties.
Hey Dhinesh, yup, I think none of us can really imagine the toll on the Koreans’ backs from their way of greeting, but when I compare them to the Japanese, I think they are much better off. I googled the Japanese manner of greeting and found out that their bows are actually divided into three kinds, the informal, formal and very formal way of bowing. Interestingly, the bows get lower for more formal occasions and when expressing stronger emotion and deeper respect. They definitely deserve our respect too!:)
ReplyDeleteThis topic brought to mind my experience of bowing. In primary and secondary school, students were required to bow when greeting a teacher, because it marked a sign of respect for the person who is of a superior position than us. The angle of bowing is definitely lesser than 30 degrees though…:)For me, habits certainly die hard, and it has become so natural now to bow slightly or at least nod when greeting an elder or someone whom I feel is of a more respected position than me. Thankfully, I don’t have backaches yet.:)
Yup Terence, greeting in a style that the other party is familiar with definitely reduces the awkwardness and bridges the gap between two parties with different cultural backgrounds. That was indeed what I experienced when the pastor shook my hand and I guess they would have felt the same way when I greeted them in their style. Thanks for reminding me on some important aspects of communication (and probably, life), and that is to consider others’ feelings before our own and to be more adaptable and less resistant to change. I think, in that way, I can better appreciate the beauty and uniqueness of the other party’s culture.
ReplyDelete